Parents always tell you that having a child changes your life. It's not about you anymore but about your baby. They tell you that now your life consists of loving them and doing everything possible to make sure they have everything they need. Parents also tell you how much you will worry about where your child is, who they are with, what they are doing, where they are going, and if they are safe. They also say that until you are a parent yourself you won't be able to understand what it feels like.

What I didn't realize was that the loving, providing, and worrying starts the moment you understand the fact that you are about to be that parent. The parent that is going to cry when she has to leave her baby for the first time because she has to go back to work, the parent that is going to freak out when her baby falls, the parent who will stay up all night wondering how her baby's first night away is going.

It hit me the other night when I had what was probably the most horrible dream I've ever had in my life. That dream made me realize how real all of this is. It was the type of dream from which you wake up so emotional that you pray to God to make sure his blessings come your way and that you have to hold your tears back and keep reminding yourself that it was all a dream.. or in this case a nightmare.

This is the feeling that brings on the anxiety, nervousness, and just that all around Oh Sh*t I'm having a Baby!! feeling.

You know what though.. it's a great feeling..

Let's just hope that dream isn't recurring lol.

I have a feeling that Jr. is running out of room in there because these past two days he's been kicking me nonstop.. well not really nonstop but i guess when he's not kicking he's sleeping..

You know what is the weirdest thing I've ever felt? The other day I was laying in bed and I swear I felt Jr. stretching and I felt his whole body from one side of my belly to another. It was weird and wonderful at the same time. At one point last week he must have decided to sleep real close to me because on the left front side of my stomach was a knot.. maybe like 2 inches in diameter.. my stomach looked all lopsided lol.. Omar had to massage him so he could move a little.

Nana last weekend did the cutest thing.. We are always telling her that there's a baby in my belly.. but I didn't think she really understood.. I mean she knows what a baby is because she always says "baby!" when she sees one.. But I guess now she's understanding because she came up to me touched my stomach and said "baby" and then walked away and went back to playing with her cousins. I want the kids to have a good relationship that's why I hope she is starting to understand that way when the baby is here she won't have such a hard time accepting him. I know jealousy is common among siblings.. I just don't want it to get in the way of their relationship.

Feeling all of this movement has started me thinking about how big he's gonna get.. how big I'm gonna get.. it's so weird even after 25 weeks how amazing all of this is.

This really is the beginning of the rest of my life. It's not just about me anymore.. it's not just about me and Omar and the girls.. but it's about Jr. too. It's overwhelming...

Omar has decided that its about time to start planning for our baby shower. It's exciting because we get to register for all this new baby stuff. lol. I'm not expecting to get all of it.. I know times are tough but it's still nice to pick it all out.

Anyway lately I find myself looking up all types of information on babies and safety, breastfeeding, bonding, siblings,.. gosh there's so much to learn. Can you imagine how much it has to suck for someone who hasn't really had any experience with a baby?? They'd go crazy with information overload.

So a word of advice --> spend time with kids of all ages before you think of engaging in activities that can lead to a positive sign after you pee on a stick lol.

As forBaby and me.. we just keep growing. lol. They say that by this time the baby should be about 13 inches long and weigh 1 and a half pounds. I don't think my stomach is that big yet though.. that would explain why Jr. can kick me on both my left and right sides at the same time. It's pretty funny actually. Lately he has taken to kicking for hours as fun as it is sometimes not being able to breathe doesn't feel so great. lol.

One thing that really is not great is that I can't sleep on my stomach anymore and pretty soon I won't be able to sleep on my back. The good thing is that our bed is extremely comfortable.. I love it :)

Well since Jr. is kicking up a storm let's go see what else we can register for lol.

It is now 2009 and that means we have a whole year of laughs, tears, love, lies, family, friends, work, memories and whatever else decides to come your way. In my case I will be giving birth to a beautiful baby boy.

I'm 24 weeks or 6 months now. Jr. loves kicking, stretching, and moving all the time. I don't mind it although I'm not going to lie.. sometimes it hurts lol. The closer it gets to April the more anxious, excited, and nervous I get. I can't wait lol. I know I say that alot and sometimes I tell him to take his time but sometimes I just want the time to come just so that I can hold him in my arms instead of my belly lol.

Looking back on 2008 I have good and bad memories but I guess that's the case for everyone. Here's a good new year's resolution.. Try to make more happy memories than sad ones. That might be easier said than done but there will be 365 days for you to try.

Anyway... Live life to the fullest and don't regret a second of it because that regret you might have to live with for the rest of your life. Love yourself and those close to you. God Bless!!